So I have mustered up the courage to step out and do something new, completely out of my comfort zone. I have moved beyond just thinking about starting a blog and have jumped headfirst into sharing a part of myself with total strangers. Yea me! The person who remains private about the inner workings of my heart, soul, and mind. Now what?! There are so many different thoughts running through my head as I write this. Is this even something I should do? Who will even read this? Why even share my experiences, they may never be read or understood? Yet here I am trusting Him. Trusting that every “yes” I decide to say leads me to another opportunity to see Him blow my mind.
That’s the thing about trusting God. When you decide to allow Him to lead you…you have to be willing to follow. We often forget that this was the first test for the disciples. In Matthew 4:19, Jesus says to Simon (Peter) and Andrew to follow Him. Can you imagine?! Someone you don’t even know walking up on you and saying I see you are working but stop what you are doing and I will teach you to do more. That is what I think every time I read this passage of scripture. Peter and Andrew must have been crazy to leave all they knew to follow an unknown man to do an undisclosed thing because He commanded them to. Yet in the next verse they are doing just that! Dropping everything that made sense to what they know about life and following Jesus. I can barely decide what to wear to work every day, but these men had no problem leaving it all behind. I struggle with following the call of God. Not because I don’t believe that He is real…more so because I just did not believe I was able to do the assignment.
Even now I am not sure if I can do it. When I think about what He may ask me to do I become fearful. Yup, it scares me because of so many reasons, but the biggest one is to not be able to complete what is it is that He asks of me. Yet He reminds me in 2 Corinthians 3:5-6, that I within my own means, understanding, and strength am unable to do what He has called me to do but from Him through His spirit He has provided me all I need. He basically told me to take my eyes off myself and look to Him just like the disciples did when they decided to follow Him.
There you have it! The next steps are to keep my eyes on Him as I venture into this new chapter of life. In order to do that He must be the most important part of my life. Spending time and getting to know Him is a top priority that I cannot take lightly. The disciples did everything with Jesus allowing Him to change their understanding of who God is and how He works in and through His people. None of them were perfect, I don’t expect that I will be either. For now, I will focus on allowing Him to open up my eyes to see Him in a new light.